A Lesser Used Word..? & Sunday Snippets…


Forlorn – definition: 1) feeling sad and lonely especially because of being left alone: 2) hopeless

Forlorn_Puppy_by_ajsharmaForlorn Puppy by ~ajsharma

As I was searching for a suitable picture for this post,  I came across many images of puppies, abandoned buildings, sad looking children, graveyards and distress in many forms. The word is a very powerful image maker but it seems to be out of fashion when it comes to its use now-a-days.  We have all read the classics where a woman is described as forlorn when her love is not requited or lost. The imagery of her gradually failing and becoming waif like is very strong.

Such an emotive word should not, I feel, be lost to the language of story telling. Of course we can use other words, such as desolate, bereft, miserable, wretched and even forsaken, which is in decline as well, I believe but forlorn is the ‘king’.  A puppies pleading eyes can only be forlorn.

I found a beautiful poem by Bernd at http://timelessferry.wordpress.com/

Forlorn, for the first time ever – lonely.

Forlorn, gone is the love of my life, happiness is destroyed.

Forlorn,  dominated by grief, tears flow and flow, will never stop.

Forlorn, deep pain rips everything deep inside me, it is excruciating.

Time passes, really too slowly.

Time shall heal wounds, heal pain.

Time may you tell me, is it almost time?

Time let me know, when I’m free again.

The hope, I carry with me.

The hope, each day a new attempt to live, to survive.

The hope, find peace with the pain.

The hope,  to break free from the shackles, let go the old things, finally find new happiness.

sunday_snippets2

Also as it is Sunday Snippets – I have included a short piece from the 18th century period of my novel, The Twesome Loop. Gabriella has found her husband’s brother to be truly understanding and her affections are clear. When her husband William decides his brother has over stayed his welcome :

Things Lost

“It is time you took your leave, my brother, you have dallied here far too long. I will purchase the villa in Agagni and want you to organise it on my behalf.”

“You may want to inspect the building and grounds before the purchase, William. May I suggest you travel to Italy to see the details are correct?”

“I am confident you will ensure all the details are correctly documented, Arthur. I have organised a carriage to take you to Dover in the morning.”

Gabriella’s dismay must have shown on her face.

“Are you sorry to see my brother leave, my sweet?”

“I am – he has been good company these past few weeks. The tales of his travels have been most entertaining.”

“Well, you shall be travelling with me in a few months time to my new property in Italy.”

“I look forward to seeing Italy; from what Arthur has told me, it is very beautiful.”

The evening seemed to draw out for hours before William finally left for his room.

“Please do not leave me here with him, Arthur. He will surely subject me to his lusts once you are gone.”

Fellow Snippet Bloggers:

http://mermaidssinging.wordpress.com/

http://caitlinsternwrites.wordpress.com/

http://ileandrayoung.com

http://wyrmflight.wordpress.com/

http://www.mandyevebarnett.com

http://womanbitesdog.wordpress.com/

http://jennykellerford.wordpress.com

http://jennifermeaton.com/

http://richardleonard.wordpress.com

http://jordannaeast.com

http://letscutthecrap.wordpress.com

http://writerscrash.blogspot.com/2013/01/critique-blog-hop.html?showComment=1359314347792#c7304398839545720473

6 thoughts on “A Lesser Used Word..? & Sunday Snippets…

  1. -Thanks to your quick summary at the start, I had an idea of who might be speaking in those first pieces of dialogue, but without it, a reader may find it difficult to pin point which character is saying what. Maybe a dialogue tag or two will help out in this instance.
    -Following the dialogue there seems to be a rather sharp leap forward in time; from that beautiful, emotive dialogue to ‘The evening seemed to draw out…’
    -It seems rather a shame to do this because your dialogue is doing such a great job of showing of the dynamic between these three characters, then this line of narrative seems a little rush.
    -I hate telling people this, since it it harped on about so much, BUT… is it possible to show the tedious and slow passage of time rather than just telling us about it? You can play about with more dialogue, or even some descriptive narrative about clock watching, fidgeting and the change in the shadows of the room, that sort of thing.
    -I do, however, really like that last line; ‘subject me to his lusts…’ Teehee, that may be the erotic writer in me, but I can feel the reluctance hiding in those words which gives me all sorts of new questions.
    -There isn’t much emotion elsewhere however and I’m torn because your dialogue is strong enough to carry it off, but instinct tells me that you may benefit from a tiny bit more narrative to back it up.

    Hmm. Sorry that’s so babbly; I hope it’s helpful to you!

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  2. The dialogue feels tense here. I can sense terrible undercurrents. Poor Gabriella doesn’t seem to know what to say to appease her husband.
    I like the high-handedness of hubby. I’ve summoned a carriage, and you’ll be on it!
    But I could use more description. Does William loom over Gabriella? Does she shrink into her chair? Is Arthur trying and failing to look happy to go?
    Same with “the evening seemed to draw out for hours” I like the idea of it, but I could use more. Like the ticks of a clock echoing in the silence, or someone reading and re-reading a page in a book because they can’t concentrate… Then the reader feels what the characters do.
    Also, I agree forlorn is a great word.

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